[title subtitle=”review: Marla Cantrell”][/title]
A Memoir of Food, Love, and Family, with Recipes
By Dawn Lerman | Berkley Books, New York | 318 pages |$16
When My Fat Dad begins, author Dawn Lerman sets the stage this way: “As far back as I can remember, there was an invisible wall that separated me from my dad, a distance that I could never completely penetrate. His closest relationship was with the bathroom scale—his first stop every morning and his last stop every evening. It controlled his moods, our days, what we were going to eat, and basically ruled our family life.”
Dawn’s father, who eventually topped the scales at 450 pounds, was a star in the advertising business, responsible for ad slogans such as Fly the Friendly Skies of United™, Leggo My Eggo®, and Coke® is It. Dawn’s mother was an aspiring actress, thin and uninterested in food. Often, her meal of choice was a can of tuna eaten over the kitchen sink, the phone tucked between her ear and shoulder, talking to one of her friends.
Dawn’s parents married young, fought terrifically, and sent Dawn to her grandmother Beauty’s on weekends, a move that played heavily in her young life. There, the two cooked traditional Jewish foods Beauty loved. And after they cooked, they sat and ate and talked about the majesty of a home-cooked meal, made with love and served with care.
At the end of each chapter, Dawn shares the recipes of her growing up years in the 1970s. It is a unique way to tell this story. Here is what happened, she says, and this is what we ate. For a while you think things are going to be just fine. She deals with a lot at home, but on the weekends she blooms around Beauty. Dawn is exceptionally bright, intuitive, and her tales of family life are often funny.
A third of the way through this memoir, the Bohemian family moves from Chicago to New York City, and the stability of Beauty and her cooking fades. Each week she sends Dawn twenty dollars and family recipes so they can stay connected through food.
At home, her father’s escalating weight causes his boss to suggest a trip to a “Fat Farm,” where he stays for months, eating tiny portions of white rice and lean meat and fruit. This place had the reputation for being a second home to celebrities Dom DeLuise, Shelly Winters, Elizabeth Taylor, and allegedly, even Elvis. The weight falls off, 175 pounds of it, but once he returns to his normal life, his struggle resumes.
At times, the book reads like the tale of a poor little rich girl. She makes friends with a cook named Olga in the school cafeteria. She befriends a homeless man who tells her he can see her loneliness. She’s left alone in the family’s apartment for long stretches. She runs the streets of New York, under-aged and unchecked, ending up at Studio-54 where she sees Andy Warhol, Liza Minnelli, and Mariel Hemingway.
This is not a bitter story, however. Dawn’s mother, creative and driven, taught her a great deal. Her father, creative and charismatic, could make the world seem like a magical place. They became parents when they were young, she says. They were from the “me” generation. They loved her then, and they love her now.
If that isn’t enough to draw you in, the recipes certainly will. A few standouts are Creamy Cashew Butternut Soup, Beauty’s Baby Shell Kugel with Golden Raisins, and Beauty’s Savory Meatloaf Cupcakes with Mashed Potato Frosting.
My Fat Dad will leave you hungry. It will make you consider the power of food in any relationship. And it will take you back to the Mad Men era, for a look at a family you may never forget.
